One-Liners from Some of the Funniest Comedians

Elevate Your Mood With Witty One-Liners from Some of the Funniest Comedians

Elevate Your Mood With Witty One-Liners from Some of the Funniest Comedians

There is nothing like reading a good one liner to help lift your spirits. The right joke, saying, or sarcastic words can help you momentarily forget your hardships or a little of the drama that always tend to pop up. When you are feeling down, there’s nothing wrong with spending a little time reading a few of the best one liners.

Rodney Dangerfield has some of the best one liners. His one-liners are self-depreciating, but they are still extremely humorous. Here is one of his funniest punch lines:

“A girl phone me the other day and said ‘Come on over, there’s nobody home.’ I went over. Nobody was home.” — Rodney Dangerfield

This punch line is funny because just about everyone has some insecurities when it comes to dating. People can relate to feeling a little insecure when someone they would really like to date contacts them. Just imagine showing up at a person’s house for what you think is a hot date, only to find out that the person isn’t even there. Rodney Dangerfield gained fame for jokes like the one above.

Joan Rivers has a snarky style that most people can’t resist. Quite a few of her one liners center around her own plastic surgery and around her appearance. Like Rodney Dangerfield, self-depreciating jokes are her thing. Here is one of her quick-witted plastic surgery jokes.

“I’ve had so much plastic surgery, when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware.” — Joan Rivers

“The Tonight Show” talk show host Jay Leno has a series of funny political one liners that he said on his show. For example, according to the site Notable Quotes, he made the memorable statement below in October 2011 in reference to the American economy. Anyone who has had financial problems, or anyone who has ridden on a major airline can’t help but chuckle at this one.

“In spite of the poor economy, almost 70 percent of Americans occasionally splurge on luxury items – like a blanket on a plane, or a peanut.” — Jay Leno

Leno is also making fun of the airlines that charge passengers for things that were once free (or included in the price of an airline ticket).

Jeff Foxworthy‘s “You might be a redneck if…” jokes made him famous. Even people who do not know his name probably recognize his jokes.

Here is one of Foxworthy’s infamous redneck jokes: “You might be a redneck if your ironing board doubles as a buffet table.” — Jeff Foxworthy

Foxworthy is also an author, and you can read a collection of his jokes in his “You Might be a Redneck if…” books. He even has a couple of redneck dictionaries.

Funny quotes make fun of something that most people can relate to. The delivery of the joke can add further humor to the joke. Most comedians have mastered the art of delivering their jokes with a straight face and with deliberate pacing.

Anyone who had a negative camping experience would get a laugh from this Dave Barry one liner: “Camping is nature’s way of promoting the motel business.”

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